[FEATURE] Even a Little Birdie Can Tweet about Eternal Primacy of America

Tuesday, November 02 2010 @ 09:39 PM JST

Contributed by: Y.Yamamoto

Capitalizing, directly or indirectly, on the blessings of the Internet, political analysts have been proliferating all over the world. In America, alone, there are millions of them if you include self-styled pundits.
You can classify them into two types: weather forecasters and Monday morning quarterbacks. It's a known fact that there always is a cozy relationship between the two groups. Unless pundits who specialize in predictions are so prone to misread clues to future events, MMQBs are out of work. And if MMQBs have a good command of sophism to convince their audience that they are not just secondguessing, prophets lose their jobs.

In between the two categories, you sometimes come across amphibians who have the guts to play the two different roles all by themselves. By doing so, they effectively hedge against the risk of losing jobs.

It's some of these amphibious pundits who foresaw the emergence of a new and viable Japan in June when Naoto Kan and Katsuya Okada succeeded Yukio Hatoyama and Ichiro Ozawa as prime minister and secretary general of the Democratic Party of Japan, respectively.

In fact, though, signs of the total collapse of the country have since been felt, rather than just imagined, around the clock and on every corner of the Japanese archipelago. Those who have good ears even hear the entire edifice crashing down.

Five months after the misogi-like transition of power, even these zombie-like people can tell the Kan administration will fall apart in a matter of months.

When it comes to foreign relations, the Tokyo government is now in total gridlock because Moscow, Beijing and Pyongyang are steadfastly closing in on the doomed nation. I'm inclined to term it the MBP strangulation regimen after the ABCD alliance against Japan in 1941.

Kan and his foreign minister Seiji Maehara are counting even more on their American counterparts for help. They know that if the Republicans are to regain lost ground toward 2012, that won't make a bit of difference to the absurd security arrangement between the two nations, one dead and the other dying.

This is yet another confirmation of Douglas MacArthur's testimony at a joint committee of the Senate. On May 5, 1951, the general exquisitely said: "Measured by the standards of modern civilization, [the Japanese would be like boys] of twelve, as compared with [Americans' and Germans'] development of 45 years."

MacArthur was so foresighted that he also knew by 2010, all Americans would look like 104-year-olds.

So, are amphibious pundits in America blushing or scratching their empty heads these days?

No, that's what they will never do. As usual, they have a good excuse, particularly in this November. "Currently we are too preoccupied with the midterm election to be really concerned about Japan. Maybe we were a little too optimistic when we said the country was getting back on the right track. But so what?"

It's in this intellectual vacuum that a growing number of political analysts in the U.S. have started twittering. The eagles have lost their piercing eyes to identify their targets and sharp claws to cut out enemies' hearts. So all they can do is just to keep chirping.

It's true that they can't outdo the Japanese who are very good at compressing ideas into the traditional 17-syllable format. But that doesn't really matter; Haiku poetry and tweets are basically the same thing.

The beauty of the 140-character rule lies with the fact that even a little bird can tweet about democracy, oppression-free society, nuclear-free world, emission-free vehicles, economic growth with no one left behind, or whatever he wants to chirp about.

What is more, if you are a highly-educated bird, you can even make your tweet sound as sophisticated as this:

"Blackbird promised to bring about change in the avian world. But he failed to deliver it. Here's your lesson: vote for Egret in 2012 as I did in 2008. Tweet, tweet."

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